Survival and how not to do it

This is the movie that I happened on during my channel flopping last night.  I love movies like this.  I can't remember what I was doing in 2004 that I didn't go to see it.  Anyway, I caught this one about half way through.  An ice age eh?  Hadn't really thought that one through.  And this from a girl whose mother made sure that she knew how to build a house out of sod and prepare the dirt floor so that can be kept as clean as tile.  She was only a generation away from people who needed to know stuff like that, so who's to say that we won't need to again?

I really didn't mind missing the first half with all the character and plot development details.  It was actually probably better for me just to get straight to the surviving part.  Let the fun begin!  The hero and his nerdy group of friends, takes refuge in the New York Public Library.  It's on high ground and near by and letting people in, so I think this is probably a fairly decent choice.  The streets begin to flood as our hero's party approaches, so there is a mad dash to get inside.  (Remarkably, everyone seems to be in dry clothes once inside, but if I can let this slide for James Bond, I can let it slide for this guy.)  People are milling about in this massive library hall.  At this point I start yelling to Zach, who happened to wander in while I was watching, "Organize!!  What are those fools doing?!"  Zach, who has already seen this film points out that they will organize in awhile.  Not good enough.  Get these cold (and realistically wet) people higher (because we know the street is flooding and that heat rises), and into small rooms.  I'm guessing that the NY library has offices somewhere on the upper floors.  Stay away from offices with windows, put as many as can comfortably fit in a room so they can share body heat.  Try to fill rooms that share walls.  Little kids get priority as far as dry clothes are concerned.  Infants go inside the dry clothes with an adult.  Nobody takes off their hats.

Back to the movie.  The hero hears from his father who is a scientist and who tells him that a freakishly cold storm is coming and if they go outside they will die.  So a policeman helpfully tells everyone that since the flooded water is now frozen enough to walk on that they should leave and try to evacuate on foot.  Hello?  I think it's very unlikely that you would be able to talk many people into evacuating on foot under those conditions.  However, perhaps because he's an authority figure, and perhaps because he's the only person with a plan, the people decide that this is a good idea.  Remember that they have not taken my advice and are still milling about aimlessly in a cavernous freezing cold room.  The hero jumps up and begs them not to go outside. He convinces a couple of people in addition to his group of friends.  At least one of the people who stays is a librarian and she now reveals that the library has a room with a fireplace.  Unfortunately this is another cavernous room and in addition has walls of windows.  I'm okay with this.  We know what we're working with, because dad has told us that a storm is coming that will freeze everything to death instantly.  We aren't in the best room to deal with this, however we have abundant materials to work with and most of the other people are gone so we don't have to worry about saving them too.  So our heroic cast starts burning books and spreads out to make themselves comfortable.  What ?!!!! No no no no no!

I can see that I'm going to have to continue organizing for them.  Yes, rip up some books for kindling and while you are making sure that you can get the fireplace flue to draw up the smoke and starting your fire, have some of those young testosterone filled geeks that you brought with you bust up some furniture.  They get to fulfill an important function that they will think is pretty fun and wood burns better than books.  Send two people to empty the vending machines and bring back the food.  While they are there, tell them to look around for a coffee pot, or something that they can use to melt water by the fire.  Probably vases or urns would do the trick.  While these two are out of the room scavenging, get the burly lads, or whatever kind of muscle you have, to start bringing in some of those big wooden tables.  Use tables, rip up carpet, whatever you have to do to block off those huge windows.  (Remember, you have a fire for light.)  Now comes the fun part.  Remember the forts you used to build out of couch cushions when you were a kid?  We're going to build a fort around the fireplace.  We can use any of the furniture we want.  We need to make sure we have a roof so all of our heat doesn't escape to the high ceiling.  I would suggest ripped up carpet for that.  Use stacks of books on the outside for insulation.  Ration food, sleep close together in shifts and make sure that someone is always feeding the fire.

Do not leave this room to go looking for antibiotics!  The girl with blood poisoning can most likely make it through the storm if you keep her wound lower than the rest of her body and use a hot compress to draw out the poison.  If that doesn't work, you will only lose one person from the party instead of the three that they send out in the movie.  In the movie the boys find the antibiotics, fight some wolves and make it back inside before the deep freeze hits.  I wouldn't have risked any of the heat from the boys going out and coming back in cold.  I would say this even if I was the one with blood poisoning.

If I was the protagonist in an ice age, my dream team of nerds would include: my son Hamad, Benjamin the ninja who lives here, Walker Stern and my niece Kate.  Anyone of us could've come up with a better plan than the group in the movie.

Let me know who would make up your dream team.