Friday, March 29, 2013

Scars

One of the strange things that we Jews do is to rip our clothing when a close relative dies (parents, spouse or children).  It's actually very cathartic to be able to rip at your clothes when you are in deep grief.  When mom died, I was wearing a favorite sweater, that I then threw away.  When dad died, I was wearing a silly Captain America sweat shirt.  I like that shirt.  The guys in the sushi place salute me when I'm wearing that shirt.  I was going to throw it away after I ripped it.  But I think I've decided to sew it back together.  It will just have a scar.  It will be a visual reminder of my emotional scar.

Our newly remodeled synagogue also has a scar.  On the front wall where the neo-Nazi spray painted hate messages, there is a rather blotchy coat of new paint.  In certain light, you can still see the shadow of darkness underneath.  I like it.  The pristine synagogue felt a little uncomfortable to me.  Too clean.  Scar-less.  Like an old woman with a perfect face lift.  Something not quite right.

So if you see a woman wearing a scarred Captain America sweat shirt, you can go ahead and salute.

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